Non-Naked, Non-German, Non-Sex Tourist Plunges From Hotel Window

Thai Police Baffled At Unprecedented “Karl Slym” Case   BANGKOK – The Royal Thai Police are asking the public to help with any leads in the mysterious death of Karl Slym, 51, who died after jumping out of a hotel window Monday despite not being naked, German, or in the presence of one or more Thai prostitutes. “We’ve simply never seen a case like this before,” said Police Lieutenant... 

Nation “Mood Meter” Saves Newspaper Industry

BANGNA – The global decline in the traditional news industry, once considered inevitable, appears to have been completely and permanently reversed by the innovative addition of a “Mood Meter” on the website of the Nation, Bangkok’s second-largest English-language press. By allowing users to click on a selection of faces ranging from “Happy” to “Angry” to “Mai Pen Rai” after reading... 

Ku De Ta Gives Up

SATHORN – Bangkok’s newest high-end nightlife and entertainment complex, Ku De Ta, announced yesterday that it was giving up on Bangkok completely after three months of ridiculous circumstances. Despite spending an estimated 430 million baht building, designing, and aggressively marketing the two-level, three-nightclub, four restaurant complex on top of Sathorn Tower, the Singaporean parent company... 

Bangkok Businesses Thrilled To Be Targeted By Bangkok Protesters

BANGKOK – As the January 13 shutdown of the capital by the People’s Democratic Reform Committee approaches, Bangkok’s business are happily preparing for the patriotic destruction of their revenue streams by the people they totally agree with. “I can’t wait to show Thaksin and his stupid upcountry buffaloes what we’re willing to do to stop him,” said Gupta Jittimas, owner of a travel... 

Awful Bangkok Wine Bar Names Traced Back To Single Awful Copywriter

BANGKOK – In a shocking revelation that has rocked the F&B advertising and marketing world, the mystery of Bangkok’s ridiculously-monikered wine establishments has been conclusively shown to be the work of a single, horrible English-language copywriter. NTN investigations have proven that Dmitri Kafelnic, a Romanian-born British citizen, is the creative mind behind the dozens of grammatical...