DESPERATELY SEEKING:

Our first customer. Contact Central Embassy Cinemas, or Madame Tussaud’s Wax Museum. Please.

EMPLOYMENT WANTED:

Former nightclub singer, will work late hours, pose for pictures, endure humiliation. Contact Srirasmi10@gmail.com

FOR SALE:

Everything that was for sale previously. What, you thought things would change?

LOST:

Well-deserved moment in the spotlight, and accolades from all Thais. If found, please return to Thailand Women’s Football Team. Thanks.

WANTED:

Childish, insight-free ideas that I can over-explain in un-funny, condescending pictures that waste five seconds of any person’s life who looks at them. Contact stepff@nation