Prayuth Orders Deployment Of Concerned Facial Expressions

BANGKOK – In response to Monday’s deadly bomb attack in Bangkok’s Rajprasong district, the Thai prime minister ordered the immediate mass deployment of every concerned facial expressions at his disposal, including several which have never been used before. Speaking on a televised national address, Prayut Chan-Ocha, who took power in last year’s coup, presented the appearance of deep and abiding... 

Social Divisions End As Thais Move Forward Together Singing

BANGKOK, PROVINCES – Years of political divided-ness came to an end in the united and prosperous Kingdom of Thailand this week as Thais all over Thailand came together to endlessly celebrate the togetherness of working together for the benefit of all Thai peoples and the society at large. Elections were postponed by overwhelming demand of true majority who see the essence of beautiful Thailand in... 

Junta Name Change Earns Instant Global Legitimacy

BANGKOK — Global criticism of the military coup d’etat that seized power in Thailand last Thursday  came to an immediate halt when the Peace and Order Maintaining Council (POMC) changed its name to the National Council for Peace and Order (NCPO) yesterday. “We were wrong about the coup, and now fully support it,” said US Secretary of State John Kerry. “It turns out... 

Thais Protect King From Deadly Ballots

BANGKOK – A possible overthrow of Thailand’s longstanding and revered monarchy was narrowly averted Sunday when courageous groups of patriotic citizens prevented the use of thousands of voting ballots by persons with ill intentions. “We heard that bad people who didn’t love our king had assembled an arsenal of over a million ballots in locations throughout the city,” said Issara Semchaiyat,... 

Sondhi Gently Suggests Suthep Buy Bulletproof Car

BANGKOK – Former anti-Thaksin leader Sondhi Limthonkul sent an email to People’s Democratic Reform Council secretary general Suthep Limthongkul this morning, strongly recommending that he buy himself a bulletproof vehicle that could “withstand M-16 rounds fired at close range.” The letter, a copy of which was obtained by Not The Nation, expressed general support for Suthep’s work, which Sondhi...