BANGKOK – The Metropolitan Police are taking “no chances” with security and have ordered 12,000 valet parking attendants for this Thursday’s gathering of supporters of the Democrat Party, who will hold their campaign’s biggest rally in the Rajprasong area of the city. “We are not taking sides in this election,” insisted Gen Wichean Potephosree, head of the Metropolitan Police. “We are... 

BANGKOK – In a major policy announcement today, the Democrat Party presented a three-phase, two-year plan to drastically improve the way Prime Minister Abhisit Vejjajiva appears in photographs, digital images and video. “We have listened to the people of Thailand, and they are telling us that ‘Mark’ looks very uncomfortable in pictures,” said Deputy PM Suthep Thaugsuban, referring to Abhisit... 

BANGKOK – The People’s Alliance for Democracy and their associated New Politics Party voted Monday to boycott the upcoming parliamentary election and any subsequent measures of reality that use objective data such as vote tally. “The counting of votes to determine leadership is a failed policy,” said Suriyasai Katasila, NPP’s secretary-general, during the party’s annual assembly in Bangkok.... 

SILOM – The Thai Patriots Network, or TPN, is now claiming an infringement of Thai soil in downtown Bangkok by occupational Japanese tourists and residents. “Thaniya is undisputably within Thailand’s borders according to every accepted map,” said TPN leader Chaiwat Sinsuwong. “Yet for years it has been occupied by Japanese expatriate forces, who have claimed it for their own.” According... 

BANGKOK – The government has asked former Thai prime minister Anand Panyarachun to solve yet another of the country’s problems, this time appointing the elder statesman to tackle a massive infestation of rats on Lad Phrao Soi 72/1. Anand has become the go-to-man for governments in times of trouble. Besides dealing with the rat infestation on Lad Phra Soi 72-1, the widely respected 78-year-old...