BANGKOK — After spending two weeks assuring his friends and family that his three-week-holiday-turned-three-year-relocation to Thailand was over, Reading native James Cullen suddenly changed him mind today, only three-and-a-half minutes after landing at Suvarnbhumi Airport.
Cullen had spent the previous two weeks drinking in pubs with university mates, reconnecting with his family and enjoying chippies, curries, and “lovely” English bacon again. On the last day of his trip, Cullen confided to his overjoyed parents and closest mates that he couldn’t wait to move back to England by the end of the year.
Tears brimming in his eyes, his Dad said, “About time, son.”
A former university roommate confirmed, “He told me he didn’t know what he was doing over there. We were smoking a spliff one night and he was talking about how much he missed the lads here, the football, even the weather, and he was gutted he missed his sister’s wedding. ‘I am dead set on coming back,’ he told me.”
The owner of Cullen’s local, The Crow’s Nest, said he had conversed with Cullen daily and spent countless hours confirming to him that, “wasn’t that bad.”
“The night before he left, he came in here and said, ‘See you in a couple months, Roger. I’m through with that place. Time to come home. You keep that stool there for me.’”
Sixty seconds after exiting customs at Suvarnabhumi, Cullen spotted a Thai girl in an extremely short denim skirt and heels at a currency exchange counter, and began doubting his decision. Three minutes later, after a sideways glance at two Thai girls in spaghetti strap tops bending over their luggage, Cullen changed his mind entirely vowing never return to Britain if it was the last place on earth. Asked why, he said, “Sweet Jesus, there are a lot of hot girls here.”
