BANGKOK — In the Kingdom’s first major revision of its lèse-majesté laws since 1952, the government announced today that the prohibitions on criticism of the nation’s most revered institutions would be expanded to include the Internal Security Operations Command, or ISOC. Effective immediately, it is a prosecutable offense to “defame or offend the Monarch, the Regent, the members of the Royal Family, or the senior members and actions of the revered Internal Security Operations Command.”
The law was passed by a slim majority in the Democrat coalition-controlled House, with only the Pheu Thai members voting against it. Prime Minister Abhisit Vejjajiva signed the bill and it is expected to receive Royal endorsement this week.
“This is a very important measure in protecting both national security and our culture,” said Abhisit afterwards. “Thailand is built on the strong foundations of our three great institutions: the King, Buddhism, and right-wing paramilitary operations.”
As official head of ISOC, Abhisit will also now enjoy special protection from any criticism by the opposition, which must restrict its attacks to the Democratic party in general, or face up to 15 years’ imprisonment. However, he downplayed the benefits he might personally receive from the new lèse-ISOC laws.
“I’m hardly involved in ISOC’s daily operations,” Abhisit said. “In fact, most days I have no clue what they’re up to.”
Additionally, the history of the Internal Security Operations Command will now be included in the mandatory school curriculum, to better familiarize Thai children with the fascinating and venerable origins of this cornerstone of Siamese culture. From its mysterious origins as the CIA-backed Communist Suppression Operations Command in the ancient 1960s, through its magical survival of the overthrow of Thanom Kittikachorn and Prapas Charusathien, to its storybook bombing of hilltribe villages harboring suspected leftists in the 1970s, the ISOC tale is expected to quickly endear itself to the hearts of the Thai people.
“ISOC tried to kill the devil Thaksin, just like Lord Rama killed the devil Ramana,” explained Phatcharee Boonvarasan, a professor at Chulalongkorn’s Faculty of History. “We are just now starting to understand that ISOC has always been an inseparable part of the national fabric. In fact, I’m quite certain that the blue in our national flag represents ISOC. Or maybe white. We’ll confirm it once we find the right evidence to support our new facts.”
Other academics were critical of the new law, citing disappointment that the lèse-majesté laws were expanded rather than limited. Their comments, however, have been redacted from the public record as per requirement of the new law. Additionally they have been dismissed from their jobs and detained for possible trial in an undisclosed location. In compliance with the law, their names will not be included in this or any report.
However, most Thai media outlets have expressed cautious support of the new legislation.
“National unity and security require a new kind of politics, and this may just be the way to get there,” said an editorial in Matichon. Thai Rath was even more supportive, encouraging all “patriotic Thais” to “resist the ways of foreigners and liberate our hardworking soldiers from the yoke of burdensome accountability.”
Fah Diew Kan was an exception, calling the new laws “totalitarian” and “completely in violation of the idea of representative government.” Its editors were unreachable for comment however, after its head offices were sacked and burned by ISOC agents, who then shot their weapons at reporters who tried to film the fire, unaware that the new law prohibits documenting any ISOC actions without ISOC approval.
At a press conference later, ISOC member Lt General Manote Premwongsiri tried to assist the media by clarifying the law’s provisions to avoid confusion. He outlined a few basic guidelines, including: 1) not showing ISOC members in photos unless approved by the ISOC public relations department, 2) always placing those photos at the top of any page or website, 3) not mentioning ISOC except in a positive context, and 4) crawling on the floor when in the presence of senior ISOC members.
Premwongsiri also promised that the public relations department would soon be issuing official images of ISOC head Sonthi Boonyaratglin and popular deputy director Pallop Pinmanee to be hung in people’s homes and offices. Additionally, children will be assigned art projects glorifying ISOC’s guiding hand in Thai life, while music videos about the sacred work of ISOC will be played after the King’s anthem in cinemas starting in the summer.
Enforcement of the new lèse-ISOC laws has already begun, according to various related ministries and departments. The Culture Ministry has ordered the burning of all history books that suggest that ISOC committed atrocities in the 1970s, while the national police have issued arrest warrants for Angelina Jolie, any surviving Rohingyas, and the entire membership of the FCCT. An additional 34,000 web pages have been blocked by the Ministry of Communications and Technology, including CNN, BBC, Google, Yahoo, MSN, Bloomberg, Xinhua, Al Jazeera, The Straits Times, Wikipedia, the CIA World Factbook, the UN, YouTube, Facebook, Sanook, Panthip, and The Bangkok Post. FOX News remained accessible however, apparently benefitting from its strict editorial policy of only mentioning Thailand in connection with the sex trade or pedophiles.
