TAK BAI, NARATHIWAT— In a startling revelation, local police officer Sgt. Somchai Nopparat expressed genuine surprise upon discovering that the recent handling of detainees during the Tak Bai protest might be considered a violation of human rights.
“I’ve been in the force for 15 years,” said Sgt. Somchai, “and not once did anyone mention that piling 1,300 protesters into a few trucks could be problematic. I mean, we were just trying to be efficient.”
The incident in question occurred on October 25, when security forces detained over a thousand protesters and transported them in military trucks. Reports indicate that 78 individuals suffocated during the journey. “We thought stacking them like sardines was a space-saving measure,” Sgt. Somchai explained. “No one told us that humans need air.”
When asked about the use of force during the protest, Sgt. Somchai appeared puzzled. “We used tear gas, water cannons, and live ammunition—standard crowd control, right? It’s not like we were trying to hurt anyone; we just wanted them to disperse… permanently.”
In response to the international outcry, Sgt. Somchai admitted, “I guess we missed the memo on ‘basic human decency.’ Maybe it’s time for a refresher course.”
The Thai government has since announced plans to implement a “Human Rights 101” training program for all security personnel. “We want to ensure our officers understand that people have rights,” said a government spokesperson. “Apparently, that’s news to some.”
As for Sgt. Somchai, he’s taking the criticism in stride. “You live and learn,” he said with a shrug. “Next time, we’ll try not to treat people like cargo. Maybe we’ll even let them sit.”
