BANGKOK – Police have upgraded their security around fat foreigners following the killing of wanted terrorist suspect Osama bin Laden in by US Special Forces in Pakistan.
Although there is no specific evidence of a threat against Thailand, the government has urged heightened vigilance for possible revenge attacks on US-based targets such as the American Embassy and really fat white people.
“Embassies and their staff already have high security, so we think terrorists may just go for the nearest fat farang, since he or she is likely to be a US citizen,” said Metropolitan Police Bureau Division 5 commander Somchai Patcharainto.
“It’s the ultimate soft target,” he added.
Somchai has urged exceptionally fat persons of Caucasian ethnicity to avoid public places for a few weeks, or to mark themselves clearly with German or Canadian flags to discourage possible targeting by persons with ill intent.
Additionally, Bourbon Street Restaurant in Washington Square has suspended its Tuesday Mexican Buffet until further notice, citing security concerns and the “unacceptable risk” of gathering 30-40 obese, white people in such a confined space.
The heightened security has not been extended to Pattaya, however, where police are confident that sufficient numbers of obese Russians should provide camouflage for American expatriates residing there.
