BANGKOK – Five thousand shirtless protestors descended on Government House early this morning, creating widespread indecisiveness among police, politicians and military leaders.
The half-naked protestors began gathering by Makhawan Bridge at noon and persuaded police to let them through to Government House.
“I wasn’t sure which side they were on or if they even had a side, so I let them cross,” said Police Sergeant Manus Soopsong.
Politicians on both sides said they were mystified and would wait to see which color shirts the shirtless protestors preferred as they otherwise had no way of determining their allegiance.
Political analysts were also confounded. Academic Chris Baker said he believed that either a new movement had been born or some red shirts were just really hot.
“There are two likely explanations here and a third quite interesting one,” he told NotTheNation. “One, with the arrival of the Thai hot season, the Red Shirts are finding it extremely arduous and sweaty to protest so they took off their shirts. Two, a splinter group has formed that is cleverly defining itself by wearing no shirts at all. Or three, DJ Station closed very, very late last night.”
Confirming his third theory, Baker noted that there were no reports of any shirtless women among the protestors, “which would be an extremely exciting development indeed.”
