Thaksin Unlocks Infinite Pardon Glitch

Ethics Panel Accidentally Awards Extra Life Instead of Disqualification

2 Min Read

BANGKOK — Although technically incarcerated, Thaksin Shinawatra has once again demonstrated his mastery of Thailand’s legal code by triggering an “infinite pardon glitch” that resets his sentence each time the system tries to enforce it. Earlier this month, the Supreme Court ruled his six-month residency in a hospital’s VIP wing didn’t qualify as prison time, but instead of extending his sentence for previously circumventing his punishment, the verdict simply opened a new pardon path. His eight-year conviction has already been reduced to one year by royal commutation, and now his lawyer has stacked another petition for clemency on top, citing “the right of every inmate” — a command input that appears to restart the loop. Officials admit they never accounted for someone with such high rankings in combatting legal encounters when drafting the legal code and haven’t found any successful patches that can match Thakin’s seeming mastery over every judge and prosecutor sent to stop him. “The system tries to contain me, but I have been studying since the very early days. I know all the backdoors since ‘Up, Up, Down, Down, Left, Right, Left, Right, B, A, Start,’” Thaksin said confidently, while standing stoically inside Klongprem Central Prison. Analysts warn that while the glitch is permanent, other inmates should not attempt it without first reaching the billionaire level.

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