BANGKOK – Actor Pongpat Wachirabanjong has pulled Thailand back from the brink with his incredibly insightful acceptance speech during an awards show held over the weekend.
Bringing tears to the eyes of many in the audience and resulting in a heartfelt standing ovation that appears to have resolved the country’s impasse as only an actor can, Pongpat told the audience, in part: “If you hate dad, if you don’t love dad anymore, then you should get out of here! Because this is dad’s home! Because this is dad’s land!” (Roar from the crowd)
He continued: “I don’t know much about this crazy, crazy situation, but I do know this. Pussies don’t like dicks, because pussies get fucked by dicks. But dicks also fuck assholes: assholes that just want to shit on everything. And Thaksin is an asshole.” (Sustained applause)
“Now pussies may think they can deal with assholes their way. But the only thing that can fuck an asshole is a dick, with some balls.” (Cheers from the audience)
“The problem with dicks is: they fuck too much or fuck when it isn’t appropriate – and it takes a pussy to show them that. But sometimes, pussies can be so full of shit that they become assholes themselves… because pussies are an inch and half away from assholes.”
“So what I am trying to say is if you don’t let us fuck this asshole, we’re going to have our dicks and pussies all covered in shit.” (Standing ovation)
“Thailand, fuck yeah!” (Walks off the stage to thunderous applause followed by the royal anthem)
