BANGKOK – Canadian expatriate Jamie Redwood filed a police report yesterday after finding his entire one-room studio apartment plastered with BNE stickers.
When the 27-year-old expatriate teacher woke up at 3 pm on Sunday, he was startled to discover a black-and-white BNE sticker affixed to his mini-fridge door. Further inspection of his apartment revealed that the stickers were “fucking everywhere,” according to Redwood.
“I don’t really appreciate this BNE person coming into my apartment,” said Redwood.
BNE tags have appeared in unexpected places in recent days as the graffiti artist responsible for them has apparently run out of blank urban surfaces to tag. Last week, seventy-four-year-old retired secretary Bonnie Mitchell, who is visiting Thailand with her husband Frank on a final vacation before they die, was spotted walking down Sukhumvit Road unaware that a BNE sticker had been affixed to her forehead. On the same day, witnesses reported three German ladies shopping on Silom Road with the letters “B,” “N,” and “E” spray-painted across their respective rear ends.
No one has yet identified what the letters stand for or who is behind the proliferation of the BNE tag throughout Bangkok and around the world.
Not surprisingly, Lumpini police who received Redwood’s report claimed they had no idea what Redwood was talking about.
“I took them like ten meters outside the Lumpini Police Station before I found one to show them and they were like ‘So what? It’s just a sticker.’ Then they urine-tested me,” said Redwood.
A private investigator hired by Redwood agreed that it does in fact appear that the “BNE Bandit” is running out of ideas. After a lengthy examination of Redwood’s apartment, the investigator, who spoke on condition of anonymity, said, “I’d thought I’d seen it all in this business. Then I put down the toilet seat.”
